A tick
by Ellstra
Summary: Jimmy s dying. At least he claims so.


„Thomas, Thomas, where are you, THOMAS!" Jimmy ran into the servants´ hall yelling on top of his lungs, looking seriously frightened. Thomas stood up quickly, always willing to help his younger friend with any of his problems.

„What is it, Jimmy? Have you lost your hairbrush again? Or you have a pimple somewhere?" He smiled, slightly amused. Jimmy might have been a bit kinky and vain, but Thomas didn´t blame him. He actually had something to be worried about – he was really beautiful and Thomas was the first one to admit so. How would anybody be able to blame or even dislike Jimmy for his self-love? Thomas loved him.

„Oh God, no! Do I? Tell me!" Jimmy´s fingers were running across his flawless face in a futile attempt to find anything bad on it.

„No, of course not, you´re as perfect as usual. So what´s the matter with you?" Thomas came closer to his friend not making fun of him any longer.

„I´m dying, Thomas." Jimmy said as he was talking about cleaning shoes. He didn´t move and looked as serious as lord Grantham when he talked about cricket. _Very_ serious.

„What? Do you have a cold?" Thomas stepped right next to Jimmy and put his hand on the footman´s perfect eyebrow, carefully, not willing to do any harm to Jimmy´s hairstyle – he knew his friend would never forgive him. „I don´t think your temperature is higher than usual." Added Thomas afterwards – he had used to be a medician, hadn´t he?

„Nobody dies because of cold. You should know that, don´t be stupid. You´ve told me yourself." Jimmy said as the biggest doctor in the world.

„Nobody dies because of few fallen hair." Thomas replied, hiding his smile.

„Being bald is fatal. You go bald, then mad and finally you kill yourself, because you can´t stand your baldness anymore. Falling of hair causes being bald. Being bald causes suicide. Suicide means death. That means falling of hair causes death. But no, it´s even worse than that."

Thomas didn´t even try to see the point of Jimmy´s words about being bald. Now he knew how stupid it was when he said fallen hair didn´t cause anyone´s death.

„So what´s it?" He asked patiently.

„It´s a bit…personal. May we talk about it somewhere else?" Jimmy asked, begging Thomas to leave the room without questions.

„Sure," Thomas smiled. _Probably some other question about sexual fantasies or something like that._ He thought and followed the footman from the servants´ hall. They went into Jimmy´s room. Thomas was overwhelmed by memories of this place. He´d been there only once under strange circumstances and now he felt everything very sharply. Anyway, he felt it as an assurance Jimmy really forgave him. Or he was really dying.

„So will you tell me now or will we search for some other people who´d want to hear what´s your problem?"

„You think there are some?" Jimmy asked with fear in eyes.

„No, I doubt it. I don´t suppose people are so interested in your problems." Thomas replied.

„Okay. Well. I… need you to help me, Thomas. Even though I´m most probably dying – no let me talk, you can cry later – I have to die as myself."

„Go on," Thomas said. Maybe he really has some illness. _Some ridiculous one he doesn´t want anyone to know about. _

„Well, I´ll show it to you." Jimmy said and started to undress himself. _Definitely some illness._ Jimmy took off the livery and both shirts he had. For Thomas it was a bit hard to concentrate because everything he saw was Jimmy´s good-looking upper part of body. He didn t see anything which would distract the footman´s perfection.

„Here," Jimmy pointed somewhere under his left collar bone. Thomas stepped closer, breathing a bit faster than he should have. And then he saw it. It was so tiny he almost exploded with laughter.

„It´s a tick, Jimmy. They don´t cause death." _At least not in most cases._ He added in his mind, but hid it from Jimmy.

„Well I´ll be the first then." Jimmy almost burst into tears. „I feel it´s drinking the life away from me. It´s sucking all the good what´s in me and I feel my stamina leaving me. You have to help me. Will you please pull it out and kill it?"

Thomas had to try not to laugh. Jimmy was sweet in his being silly and Thomas loved him despite it, but it didn´t mean he wasn´t amused.

„Of course, if it is your dying wish, I have to do what you want." He managed to say with a steady voice. At the end of the sentence it broke, but it felt as if he was struggling tears. What Thomas was, but different sort.

„No, it´s not. May I have another one to be my dying wish?" Jimmy´s big eyes were beseeching Thomas.

„Sure, how many you want. But we´ll leave it for later, okay? Now I´ll pull the tick out so it won´t suck your life away from you." Thomas barely managed to hide a smile.

„Okay. Are you sure I´m going to survive this?" Jimmy seemed to felt uneasy. „Because I want to tell you something before I die."

„I´m sure you´re surviving. I promise you." Thomas calmed him. „Sit down."

„I trust you, Thomas," Jimmy said and sat on his bed obediently.

„I´m glad to hear that. Stay here, I´m here soon." Thomas went to the servants´ hall to get some iodine they kept there for cases like this, and piece of cotton. He wanted to go back, and then he got an idea he could gain Jimmy´s will to live back by bringing some food. Food always made Jimmy want to live, even when he´d claimed he´d been dying of a cold.

„Daisy? Can I please get some food for Jimmy?" He smiled at the assistant cook even though he knew she didn´t feel anything towards him anymore.

„Has he got a cold again?" She grinned and gave Thomas a piece of cake.

„No. A tick. But he´s dying anyway." Thomas smiled at her.

„Of course. I´ve never seen a single person who survived a tick attack."

„Don´t tell this to Jimmy. I´m sure he´d be able to die only if he wanted." Thomas nodded at her and returned back into Jimmy´s room.

„I´ve brought you something to ease your pain of death." Thomas said and placed the plate with the cake into Jimmy´s shaking hands.

„Thank you. You´re such a good man, Thomas. I´m sorry I waisted my life driving you away. I should have told you I loved you." Jimmy was usually saying stuff like this when he was lying on the death bed, so Thomas usually didn´t let it distract him. But it was harder when Jimmy told he loved Thomas. He sat next to his friend trying to get his feelings under control.

„I love you, too, Jimmy. And now let me help you. I know you´re dying but we´ll try to make you handsome for a coffin."

„I´m always handsome. You have to make me beautiful for the coffin." Jimmy corrected his friend.

„Okay then. Just let me pull the tick out." Thomas put some iodine on the cotton. Jimmy was staring at his friend with fear and ate the cake. It was his favorite, he loved the strawberry one and he was sure it tasted even better when Thomas brought it to him. He felt depressed because of leaving his friend here alone. _Who will tell him he should cut his hair?_ Jimmy knew Thomas won´t be able to live without him. He tried to stay strong because after all, it was him who let the tick bite him and cause his death so he shouldn´t cry.

Thomas´ gentle fingers were working carefully, Jimmy felt how warm they were and felt even worse knowing Thomas won´t have anybody else who he would care about. He promised himself he´ll struggle the death, for Thomas´ sake. On the other hand Thomas wondered how had Jimmy solved all his problems before they became friends. With a feel of guilt he admitted he made Jimmy to be so vain. He hadn´t been so childish before. _Maybe I was pampering him. He is so used to my care about him he really thinks he´s dying because of a tick_. Despite that, Thomas had to admit he liked being so close to Jimmy. After all, he still loved him – and he wasn´t always so silly, he still was that proud, self-confident and talented charming boy Thomas had seen when Jimmy had arrived.

„Thomas?" Jimmy´s voice was quiet.

„Yes?" Thomas asked, not looking in the latter´s eyes.

„I will fight. I won´t die if it´s not neccessary. I can´t leave you here alone." Jimmy said, voice trembling with sobs he tried to fight.

„Thank you. I really appreciate it." Thomas said, not showing how moved he was. He promised Jimmy he won´t show his affection to him so he had to swallow his strong emotions and said just this.

„No, I really will. I owe it to you for your care." The footman said firmly and then burst into tears. Thomas stopped pulling the tick out because Jimmy hid his face in hands. Thomas felt a bit uneasy to hug his friend due to his promise, but then he said himself it didn´t matter. He embraced the footman, and whispered something stupid which didn´t make any sense.

„I´m sorry, Thomas. I should be strong because of you. I just can´t, you´re always so brave. I don´t deserve you." Jimmy sobbed.

„Don´t be sorry. But I don´t think you´re dying. You can survive this if you want." Thomas didn´t want to hurt his friend´s feelings so he didn´t tell him he thought his fear was ridiculous.

„I want," Jimmy wiped his tears and smiled, „I want to stay here with you."

„Good. So let me pull the tick out." Thomas said kindly but firmly. Jimmy let Thomas work again. It didn´t take long and the tick was out, lying in the middle of brown iodine spot. Thomas used another piece of cotton to wipe the rest of the iodine on Jimmy´s chest and when he looked at him, also his face still covered it tears.

„It´s out, Jimmy. Do you want to go and burn it with me?" Thomas thought it might made Jimmy happy to deal with his torment. Jimmy looked at it, staring at it for a while. Finally he raised head and he had such a terror in eyes Thomas was afraid he was going to faint.

„Jimmy, what´s the matter? It´s dead now, it won´t jump on you again or something." He tried to calm his friend down, but it wasn´t working.

„No – noone ever told me tick looks like – like a spider." Jimmy finally managed to say weakly, hypnotizing the tick as if he was afraid it was going to come back to life.

„You´re afraid of spiders?" Thomas wasn´t able to laugh. His friend seemed to be really terrified.

„I hate them. They are awful." Jimmy said stunned. Thomas hid the tick from his sight.

„I didn´t know that. I´m sorry for that." The underbutler said, concerned.

„Don´t be. You didn´t know. Could you please burn it yourself and tell me when it´s done?"

„Oh, sure, I´m back in a minute." Thomas went out right into the servants´ hall and threw the cotton into fire. Flames ate it all, not leaving any sign of the subject of Jimmy´s fear. Thomas was sitting in front of the fireplace, thinking about his friend´s confession. Now, when he knew that, it was absolutely obvious and Thomas was surprised how easily he overlooked it. How Jimmy always refused to go into the cellar and everybody thought it was because he didn´t want to come to such a dirty place. How he hated cleaning and tidying and everybody thought he was lazy. How he didn´t want to go to the stable and everybody thought he didn´t want to go to a place smelling like that.

Thomas knew it would have been better if they had known Jimmy was afraid instead of being lazy and want to be in as comfortable place as possible. But it wasn´t his business and if Jimmy didn´t want anybody else to know, he was the only one to say so. _O´Brien would probably use it against him_. Thomas thought and returned back to Jimmy.

„It´s dead, burnt, away," he smiled at the footman who dressed up in the meantime.

„Thank you. And now you should do something with your hair. You can´t expect me to go to a public if you look like this. Come, I´ll fix it." Jimmy clapped his hands and made Thomas to sit down on a chair. Thomas sighed but smiled, happy to have his friend back.


End file.
